How do you make the decision to choose the right host family for you? It is an honest question and when the interviewer tells you that you know when it is right, then why does it scare you so much :)?
Rutt was kind enough to write her thoughts on how she made the decision and what was important to her when she was making that important decision.
The equation of a perfect match.
What is the main thing to keep in mind while finding a perfect family in a different country with 4 Skype calls, and then go and live with them for couple of years?
Frist of all ladies and gentleman and gender fluid people, listen to your agent! They usually know more about these things, they have done it long enough and if you are lucky they have also been an Au Pair and they understand the struggle you are going through. What my agent told me and what helped me the most, was to put down the pros and cons of a family. I know it may seem harsh and It is weird judging the families with such thing as giving them points, but it is necessary. You have to pick the family that has the most + signs on the side of the paper. If the families only minus is that they don’t live in the middle of HOLLYWOODs rich and famous, than you are picking for the wrong reasons. I have heard tons of girls whining about their families and how they behave and treat them, and when I ask them but how come you even chose them in the first place, the answer mainly is that “I couldn’t say no to be 30minutes from NEW YORK CITY BABY!!!” Wow, well.. I couldn’t say no to my family because they were LGBTQ friendly people, but ok … NEW YORK CITY BABY! While the girls whine about their families, it is mainly their own fault of ending up in a messed up situation. It is your choice, it is your future in whatever side of the world you are doing it.
The equation is simple, pick someone who you share the same interests, values, who are honest on the very first Skype call you have. Pick them by their personalities not by how many cars they have. Ask to see all of the members of the family. My first call was with both parents, and that is how it should be, ( not including single parents). Ask to see the kids, ask all the things you have to work with. Think of them as a new family that will help you go through all, because your real one is thousands and thousands miles away. My family took me in like I was their friend and a member of their clan. I got myself little brothers and an awesome parents on the other side of the world.
And last TIME. Take time to choose, if you want this adventure to be as positive as possible, then it can take a little bit more time as planned. TIME to think, TIME to choose, TIME to write everything down, TIME to ask all of the questions in the world (even like, what is the kids favorite color) TIME to have one extra Skype call. The families in this program won’t run out, just maybe… maybe the next one is the perfect one.
In the end of the day it is your decision, and your life. If you don’t want to be miserable in a country you don’t know nothing about and have nobody around you to support you, take time. It will all come back to the start of the very first Skype call, where you have your questions lined up, and nervous sweaty palms answering the call and seeing the family you might share the couple of most incredible years together.
Hold on tight, it is going to be a bumpy ride, if you choose the way of a fancy car on a road that has more holes in it than Swiss cheese.
Other than that. Enjoy!
Living the Dream 